This week I am spending time talking about the Pain and Peace Cycle found in the work of Terry Hargrave and his Restoration Therapy model. As I talk about previous episodes, the Pain Cycle and the Peace Cycle have transformed my life, marriage, relationships, friendships, and work. It too can transform you, your relationships, your marriage, your church staff, your corporate staff…and more.
So in this episode I want to teach you how to use the 4 steps of the Restoration Therapy model to help you practice the Pain and Peace Cycle. I love the simplicity of the model in helping people create change, but like any long lasting, transformative change, it takes practice. And I find steps to be helpful guard rails to keep people along the path as they seek change. Often in conflict, people are in fight or flight mode, and so their ability to make good decisions can become limited. But if you have steps to help you in the midst of the conflict, they can be a great tool to bring order out of chaos.
In this episode I explore:
- review of the Pain Cycle
- review of the Peace Cycle
- the 4 steps:
- Step 1: Say what you feel
- Step 2: Say what you normally do
- Step 3: Say your truth
- Step 4: Say what you will do differently
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The Hideaway Experience
I am a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist in Plano, TX. I specialize in relationships, both marriage and non-marital, as well as working with individual men and women, and adolescent boys. Some of the topics that I specialize in are anxiety, depression, transitions, spiritual issues, and all forms of relational struggles. I am the author of the books The Anxious Christian, and What it Means to be a Man. Check out my weekly podcast where I interview guests and cover a lot of these same topics.
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