These last few weeks have been pretty grueling as I have been working hard on several different projects while trying to finish up the school quarter. It’s a busy time for a lot of us and with the holidays around the corner things even seem a little bit out of control. My soul does not seem to be responding to all of this chaos to well, yet I don’t know what to put aside so that I can slow down.
The problem: A lot of my identity rests in what I do, rather than who I am. And that is brutal. So who am I if I put certain projects and events aside? That is something I’m wrestling with. This is nothing groundbreaking. Many authors have explored this issue, Henri Nouwen being one of the best as he looks at the life of Jesus and His identity being found in His relationship with His father (Mark 1:9-11) in the great book, In The Name of Jesus: Reflections on Christian Leadership.
Where does your identity rest? In the things you do? In your relationships? In your relationship with Jesus Christ?
It is a spiritual disaster for a man to rest content with his exterior identity, with this passport picture of himself. Is his life merely his fingerprints? Does he really exist because his name has been inscribed in Who’s Who? Is his picture in the Sunday paper any safe indication that he is not a zombie? If that is who he thinks he is, then he is already done for, because he is no longer alive, even though he may seem to exist. Actually, he is only pushing the responsibility for his existence on to society. Instead of facing the question of who he is, he assumes he is a person because there appear to be other persons who recognize him when he walks down the street. Since we are made in the image of and likeness of God, there is no other way for us to find out who we are than by finding, in ourselves the divine image.