Tag Archive - Wess Daniels

Your Kids Online: What Are You Doing to Them?

November 10, 2009 in Marriage-Family, Therapy-Psychology with 10 Comments

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[image by Zieak]

Something I have been torn over for a while is the question of “How much of my daughter’s life do I share online?”

With blogs, Facebook, Twitter, Flickr and other services it’s more convenient than ever to post photos, share little blurbs about their day, and our reactions as parents to certain things. And as an excited parent of a 2 year old girl I find lots of stuff I want to share with others. Even though I’ve been hesitant to blog about her, and I rarely do, people could probably find out information about her pretty quickly online. Between my wife, our families and I, there is more than enough out there. Actually, there is more online than I want there to be at this point.

But I think this is a discussion worth having because I think too many people quickly excuse it and say that “it doesn’t matter”, or if “people really want to find them, then they will.” Or some say, well the future is the internet, so we are just helping them jump online early. But maybe that is more about you than your kids.

I have seen some of the discussions going around, but one that caught my eye was Wess Daniels‘ recent post, Limiting Access: Flickr and Archiving Our Children’s Lives. Wess states:

Now, I am no alarmist and I am not about to get all privacy this and that on you, but I appreciated the question my friend Fernando put to me on twitter: “it’s about giving people control over their “digital destiny.” How will the stuff we post hit our kids future relationships?” And this is really it for me. Not only do we not know what it’s like to have our entire lives archived online, we are the ones choosing what to post and what not to post for the public.

Wess concludes with:

I’ll leave the archiving up to my daughters when they’re ready to do it themselves (Lord knows Google’s got a nice archive on me).

One of the articles that seems to have really challenged Wess’ thinking on this topic was the New York Times article Guardians of their Smiles
 from a couple of weeks ago.

This article focuses on the safety of putting so much of our kid’s lives online, but I think Wess hits on something important when he writes, “How will the stuff we post hit our kids future relationships?” As parents we are usually constantly thinking about our kid’s safety, but I do think we fail to realize what affect the online profile we are building them right now could do to them relationally.

I’m currently working with quite a few kids in therapy as well as ministry, and one of the growing conversations that kids are engaging me in is their embarrassment of what their parents are posting about them online, whether it be a picture or some random comment on Twitter. As parents we might think it’s funny to say something like, “my husband just had the birds and the bees talk with our son”, or “sometimes being a parent is exhausting.” As parents we see it as no more than an opportunity to share a piece of our life with others, or to connect with other parents online. But to your kids, it’s more than that. Continue Reading…

Dawn Nicole Baldwin: What Are You Passionate About?

April 3, 2009 in Ministry-Theology, Technology-Social Media with 9 Comments

bxw_mexico2Who is Dawn Nicole Baldwin?
Dawn is the Founder and Lead Strategist of Aspire One
, which is a firm that works with churches and nonprofits on their creative and strategic branding. You can read more about their approach and background.

I had heard a lot about Dawn through various circles, and I think the first time I remember having a conversation about her and the work she does was with Cynthia Ware. I then had the opportunity to meet Dawn briefly at Innovation3 Gathering in Dallas this last January. Though it was a brief introduction, I since then I have had the opportunity to find out more about the work that Dawn does with Aspire One, and I’m excited to see all that she does to help churches and nonprofits become more effective in their messaging.

One of the things that I tend to note about people is the company they keep and what is said about them. And Dawn keeps great company, and she is thought very highly of by her peers.  Those are good things to have.

You can find Dawn blogging here, twittering here, and her company here.

In Her Own Words

What are you really passionate about?

The thought of helping churches reach people more effectively is something that makes my heart beat fast. I grew up in a family where the Church is seen as irrelevant, legalistic and unnecessary. As a teenager, I tried going back to the little church we had attended occasionally but felt like a complete outsider. So helping churches who have a passion for reaching people who aren’t connected to God is something I’m trying to pour all of my energies into.

Continue Reading…

Dawn Carter: What Are You Passionate About?

March 27, 2009 in Ministry-Theology, Technology-Social Media with 4 Comments

dec_headshot_dh01Who is Dawn Carter?
I met Dawn online about a year and a half ago, and we soon found out that some students that I had in in the college ministry I pastored in Los Angeles, she had had in her youth group. That was our connecting point, and from there we have had the opportunity to connect in person on a couple of occasions. She has always been a huge encouragement to me, especially the last time we chatted at the Innovation3 Gathering in Dallas this last January. Dawn, not only has encouraging words to share with others, but they always seem to be so timely and prophetic as well.

Dawn is the Director of Marketing for 360Hubs, which is a web tool thats “goal is to connect people, content and ideas around an affinity need.” She is also an active member of Sandals Church in Riverside, CA. You can find Dawn blogging at Chronicles of Dawnia as well as twittering away.

Dawn, I appreciate your ministry, both online and in-person. (Not that we are distinguishing between the two).

In Her Own Words

What are you really passionate about?

I am passionate about God’s love, truth and light breaking cycles of brokenness in His Bride, the Church. Although a church-attender all my life, I’ve lived so much of my life feeling distant from God’s love, but knowing it with my head. I’ve also wasted tons of years living with lies—holding onto distorted images of who He was, who I was to Him. Now, my life is a walking example that God can take anyone, no matter how messed up they are (e.g. externally religious, morally bankrupt) and use them as a “planting for the display of His splendor”. Because these two themes — head knowledge without heart and living with lies– were prevalent while I was very churched, I am really passionate about God’s people stepping out of darkness and experiencing freedom from religiosity, addictions, shame, lies and un-grieved places in their hearts. I absolutely love seeing God free captives, especially those trapped in church culture.

Continue Reading…

Some Midweek Technology: Controversy, Convergence, Creativity and Fun

March 25, 2009 in Ministry-Theology, Technology-Social Media with 2 Comments

A couple of things in the area of technology and some of the social media tools we use–caught my eye this week. And I wanted to share them with you because I think they are of great importance for us as we think through and wrestle with the implications of our technology and our theology.

twittervoice3dscreenshot3-thumbFirst, as I have mentioned before, one of my favorite blogs is John Dyer’s, Don’t Eat The Fruit. I love his tagline, “technology is fast, but redemption is slow.”

Well, John in his free time decided to create a Twitter application for fun, but that also reflected in his creation what words could not. And his design has a very insightful theological approach. In the post TwitterVoice3D: Creativity, Chaos, and Order in the Online World, John says this:

Twitter is an amazing showcase of human creativity. Yet, as with all human creations, it needs to be ordered. If one were to fully join the conversation of Twitter, one would have to be on it all day, all the time, every minute. But to be creative as God intended us, we must order it, rather than let it order us. In a sense, we have to go against it’s nature as chaotic and discarnate and choose to make it orderly and use it for incarnate ends.

Continue Reading…

Jason Taylor: What Are You Passionate About?

March 20, 2009 in Ministry-Theology, Technology-Social Media with 2 Comments

jason_9-25-08Who Is Jason Taylor?
I met Jason online of course (thank you Twitter), and I was impressed with his thoughts, and I appreciated the great comments he was leaving on my blog, and the encouragement he gave via Twitter. Jason has a varied work experience (mortgage industry, former church planter) and he currenlty lives in Oregon where he works for a company called Ministry Coaching International. You can check out his ministry coaching bio to find out more about him.

I haven’t met Jason in person yet, but we are chatting about meeting up in Texas at some point when he is down in Austin on business. I’m loving how the online world is coming to fruition in the offline world. I find his enthusiasm and passion to be super contagious and I definitely think that there needs to be more life coaches like him.

Check out Jason Taylor’s new blog. And connect with him on Twitter.

In His Own Words

What are you really passionate about?

I’d have to point back to my Life Plan and say that my #1 passion is to influence and inspire others towards life transformation.   For me, there’s just nothing like helping someone move forward in some aspect of life.   It can be something as simple as teaching someone how to use a new technology or walking with someone through a really dark time.   I love that.

Continue Reading…

Pastors and Technology: We Need to Re-Imagine Our Roles

October 2, 2008 in Ministry-Theology with 8 Comments

Some of the commenters from my post yesterday got me thinking about some things that I just briefly want to comment on.

I ended my post with two thoughts:

Two things I think pastors, church leaders need to start wrestling with if they haven’t already:

1) Shift from geographical based ministry to online community/networking based. This does not mean people still won’t gather, but how, where and when they gather will change.

2) Technology is allowing the people/congregants to self-organize, collaborate and participate without having to go through traditional means and hierarchies of the church. I think this will change the role of the pastor drastically from the top-down leader, to more of a facilitator. I think that means we will see less and less traditional roles of pastors, and maybe even less full-time positions, etc.

Here is what I’m thinking. And I’m thinking these things not on any official research I have done, but more on conversations I am having, trends I am seeing, what I am reading, etc.

One of the issues about #2 is that people are concerned about a “consumer” mentality in the Church…more than we already have now. Also, what will be the role of the pastor.

Couple of thoughts. And they are simply thoughts, not completely worked out, but stuff I am hypothesizing and thinking on.

I think the “modularity” of Church that Andrew Jones talked about won’t drive more church consumerism, but will actually reduce it.

Why?  Because churches used to be the resource for all information (phone numbers, emails, addresses, theology, Christian education, prayer chains, etc.) and churches controlled the market on the ability to gather and organize.  Think Sunday worship, Wed. night Bible studies, etc, etc.  People traditionally have relied on the Church as the resource to gather people and dispense information.

Because of this, people would drive miles and miles to attend the church that could attract, gather and dispense the information for them.  Often this process has pulled people out of community…driving miles and miles to attend a church that is not rooted in their community where they live, etc.

I think that now people can easily organize, collaborate and dispense information themselves, they will no longer need to rely on the Church as needing to fulfill that role.  I think there will be a desire for people to organize and gather in their own communities of locality, rather than feeling the need to drive to churches who used to have to do that for them. I am not saying there will not be church or people won’t go to them. They will, but I think church will look different than it traditionally does now.

In Short: Technology=Ability to Organize and Collaborate=Congregants Taking the Responsibility Into Their Own Hands.

What about the pastor?  I think there will always be the need for a pastor, but what is a pastor is my question?  Have we possibly gotten away from the Biblical role of the pastor?

In the NT we see the correlation between the shepherd and pastor.  I have been told before by some pastors that we are to be ranchers…not shepherds. That has a whole other connotation in my mind.

One commenter said that it’s actually not the pastors who do the shepherding anymore, but the small group leaders, etc. I agree with him. It’s hard to find a pastor who shepherds.

I believe that with the ability to gather, organize and collaborate that technology affords us, it frees up the pastor to do the work of actually shepherding, rather than being the CEO, rancher, etc.  I used the word facilitator in yesterday’s post, and what I mean by that is that the Church is beginning to have the ability to organize on their own, which frees the pastor up to facilitate the movement and truly shepherd the people.

In Short: Technology=Ability to Organize and Collaborate=Congregants Taking the Responsibility Into Their Own Hands=Pastor Can Truly Be a Shepherd.

Of course my own theology and praxis is shining through there, some of which you may agree with, and some which you may not agree with.

But for any of this to take place (which I think is a great thing for the Church), churches, pastors and ministry leaders are going to have to let go of the “power” they have traditionally held, and instead be a church and people that walk humbly amongst the people they are there to serve.  Even questioning their roles as pastors in the Church.

In closing, I’m aware that some traditions/denominations already seem to embody this theology and praxis.  I wonder if Wess Daniels can shed some light on these thoughts in light of the Quaker tradition that he is a part of.

If you are wondering what to read on some of these issues, here are a few suggestions. There are a lot more, but here are some that I have found helpful and challenging. Please add to this list and let me know what you are reading that has been helpful in thinking about the issues of technology in redefining the role of pastors and the Church, especially as it relates to gathering, organizing, collaborating, etc.

Check Them Out

The Starfish and the Spider: The Unstoppable Power of Leaderless Organizations by Ori Brafman and Rod A. Beckstrom.

Here Comes Everybody: The Power of Organizing Without Organizations by Clay Shirky.

Wikinomics: How Mass Collaboration Changes Everything by Dan Tapscott and Anthony D. Williams.

Facebook for Pastors: How To Build Relationships And Connect With People Using The Most Popular Social Network On The Internet by Chris Forbes

The New Media Frontier: Blogging, Vlogging and Podcasting for Christ, edited by John Mark Reynolds and Roger Overton

Groundswell: Winning in a World Transformed by Social Technologies by Charlene Li and Josh Bernoff

Your Daily Workflow and Social Media Tools

August 20, 2008 in Ministry-Theology with 5 Comments

Does that chart scare you?

It scared me the first time I saw it.  I was given a copy of Getting Things Done: The Art of Stress-Free Productivity. And well, the book and method were hardly stress free for me, while others thrived on it.

Many of you out there are disciples of David Allen and GTD aka “Getting Things Done.” You talk about it incessantly and you have the results to show that his methods work.

Most of us on the other hand fall somewhere else and our personality, gifts and skill set help us determine the best method of workflow for us. Though I wasn’t a big fan of GTD in the beginning I’m coming around to it.

Let me point you in the direction of a couple of other sources that I have found helpful, mention my own workflow situation, as well as get suggestions from you.

Other Methods

Let me just mention a few other methods that I really like and that I have tried picking up. At the end of the day I think that most of our workflow methods are a an array of various ones that we have brought together into one workable, if not messy method at times.

First, I love this method from my friend Wess Daniels, Create a Moleskine PDA: The Student GTD Hack. Who doesn’t love a Moleskine, and how many of us need a break from “technology” and need to remove ourselves from the computer. I haven’t mastered this method yet, but I always carry a Moleskine and am slowly creating the system.

Continue Reading…

Practice, Participation and the Art of “Remixing” Church and Community

July 3, 2008 in Ministry-Theology with 7 Comments

In class my adviser, Ryan Bolger, often tells a story about a pastor of a mega-church in Arizona. One day the pastor, while walking with his son across the campus of the church he built, said, “Son, this is all going to yours someday,” and his son took a step back and responded, “I don’t want anything to do with this kind of Christianity.” It was then that this pastor realized his church was rooted in a boomer culture phenomenon (and has since gone on to rethink their mission as a church). This “mission-station” approach is rooted in a different time and sensibility than that of our younger generations. Theirs is a do-it-yourself culture: sites like YouTube, Twitter, Facebook, Wikipedia and open-source community-based software need community cooperation in order to work. These sites represent a rejection of powerful top-down hierarchies where the flow from producer to consumer maintains control, predictability and efficiently. Those influenced by the participatory culture, actively participate in creating where they see need and they do it with or without permission from those in power, they share information and welcome low levels of control, they are highly energetic and creative and they want to be active in shaping their future through a variety of grassroots means. (From the article, Remixing Faith in the 21st Century by Wess Daniels)

Recently I have been thinking a lot on two terms that author/consultant/professor Clay Shirky used in his book Here Comes Everybody: The Power of Organizing Without Organizations. He discusses, among many other things:

  1. An “architecture of participation” (coined by Tim O’ Reilly)


  2. Communities of Practice

Both embody what I think are two important necessities for the Church. That we create an environment that allows for and encourages participation among everyone. Not just pastors, directors, paid staff, or those that we often single out as having special gifts. Rather it is a community that everyone brings something to the table. And that we foster a community environment that encourages practice, which allows for mistakes, failures, successes…everything that comes along with practicing.

Churches are often bad at these two things. We don’t allow for failure, and therefore we inhibit a participatory community.

That’s why you rarely see anyone up front during worship on Sundays unless it is the paid staff. That is the way that we minimize mistakes, which therefore limits total participation. It’s a vicious cycle which eventually leads us to being consumers of Church, the community and all that is offered.

I have great hope for the Church as I see many new communities and Churches embracing some of these values of participation and practice, while also moving away from being consumers of the Church and worship. Many are also moving away from top-down hierarchies that maintain command and control. I think these moves are a step in the right direction.

Wess Daniels has got an amazing post over at Barclay Press, Remixing Faith in the 21st Century. I leave you with another great quote from the article. Then go read it for yourself because it is well worth the time.

This past April Radiohead did another thing that sparked imaginations and challenged the preexisting structures of the music industry, yet again. They setup a website and invited people to remix one of their singles, “Nude.” Along with the invitation, they released the audio tracks containing the guitars, strings, drums, bass, and vocals through the iTunes music store. They invited people to participate in a contest to see who would make the best remix of their song, all the votes would be made by Radiohead fans (the winning remix received 38568 votes). By looking at remix culture, I think the church can learn something about how creativity and imagination interacts with existing ideas and structures and builds off those resources while also moving beyond them in new ways.

Mysogynistic and Violent Christianity?

July 2, 2008 in Ministry-Theology with 13 Comments

My friend Wess has a great post on the recent issue of the satire magazine, Wittenberg Door. The magazine takes a look at Mark Driscoll and what are his….well, let’s let Wess state it since he puts it much more eloquently.

Most of you know about Mark Driscoll, he’s a mainstream pastor from Seattle with a church of about 6,000 people. He’s also infamous to many for being rather misogynistic, and focused on an overtly-testosterone reading of the Scriptures…..

Wess goes on to say,

After you read that, then read Halden’s post called, “Who Can Driscoll Worship?” where he looks at Driscoll through the eyes of astute theological criticism. This caught my attention partially because of a recent workshop I went to outlining the growing trend in masculine-focused spiritualities: promise keepers, John Elderidge, and the most recent (and most extreme) GodMen, a guys only church where the power-team, meets GI Joe, meets Sunday morning worship. You can see a promo video here. It’s interesting because in a way, it’s not at all surprising that there is an increase in a violence-oriented ministry, given the violence-saturated culture (movies, music, video games) we live in as Americans, but this certainly doesn’t make it okay. What are your thoughts?

Here’s a quote from the article (satire magazine people, remember that):

“Numbers aren’t important, but we’ve grown 81.7% a year since our launch date and I still can’t get the guys to step up and be warriors,” said Kinston. “We want to love our city and we can’t do that with a bunch of pansies who would rather play video games than go to a monster truck rally or tattoo their faces like Mike Tyson.

I’m so glad Wess has written this post. I, as well as many others have been concerned for a long time at the growing trend in men’s Christian movements that seems to equate male Christianity with violence or roughness. We all like the movies Gladiator and Braveheart, and I know Jesus was not just meek, but also a tough person. But they are movies. And his toughness seems to lay in the fact that he gave away his life, and suffered at the hands of men and women who betrayed him…eventually leading to his death on a cross. Not because he fought back with fists and weapons. I just don’t know how we can read the Sermon on the Mount (just to take one examples of Jesus’ teachings), and walk away with any notion that our maleness as a Christian needs to be draped in violence, fighting, fists, and male stereotypes.

True male Christianity (if there is such a gender stereotype) lay in our ability to lay down our lives for others. Jesus says in John 15:12-14:

My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. 13 Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends. 14 You are my friends if you do what I command.

Or in Mark 12:28-34 when he talks about the two greatest commandments:

28 One of the teachers of the law came and heard them debating. Noticing that Jesus had given them a good answer, he asked him, “Of all the commandments, which is the most important?”

29 “The most important one,” answered Jesus, “is this: ‘Hear, O Israel, the Lord our God, the Lord is one.[a] 30Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’[b] 31The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’[c]There is no commandment greater than these.”

I know men and women are different. I know men and women express their spiritual lives often very different than one another. I know little boys often pick up sticks on the ground to use as weapons (without any teaching), and girls sometimes move towards dolls, etc. I know the stereotypes, and I know that we are wired differently as well.

But just because we are made different, doesn’t mean that we need to go on and practice a violent, distorted view of Christianity in our lives. Were Christians killed in the arena? Yes. Is it a violent world? Yes. But living as Christians in this world requires a toughness greater than what you see in the UFC…it requires a toughness to love our enemies, lay down our weapons, and ultimately to lay down our lives. That is what Jesus did, and if we are followers of him, then we don’t need to be men who try and do it differently.

I thought that Brent had a great post Chopping Off Heads and Crying on Shoulders a while back.

Believe it or not I think Mark Driscoll has some good things to say on many issues, but I think they are often clouded because of the rhetoric coming from him in regards to this issue.

What do you think?

Showing Skin Continued…

May 8, 2008 in Marriage-Family with 14 Comments

I just want to acknowledge that there were and are many angles that I could have gone yesterday in my post Showing Skin at Church.

I knew this going into the post, writing the post, and at the conclusion. And it was even more evident when I received lots of feedback from a lot of you, most of it not in the comment section, but via email, Facebook chat, etc. All good thoughts.

I could have addressed the issue of men more, and the responsibility they have in this issue.

I could have gone deeper on the issue of why modesty is important.

I could have talked about the disposition of our hearts, and how that can be a guide to what modesty looks like in our lives.

I could have tried to offer guidelines. That gets messy quickly.

I could have talked about the nuances of dress, and how what might be modest in some cultures, is or isn’t in others.

So you see…lots of angles, lots of positions…lots of places to go.

And though none of my commenters or friends talked to me about this, I do want to be clear about something: This is not just an issue that we are to put on women, or blame them. That would be like Adam blaming Eve for eating the apple, taking no responsibility for himself. There is a vicious cycle at work here, and I think we all contribute to it to some degree. So the best thing we can do is to come together as communities and be open and honest about it, and the struggles that proceed. And we can be of encouragement to each other.

My friend Wess has a great post where he delves deeper into the heart of the issue: On Immodesty: Too Much Skin (At Church and Elsewhere)?

Also, I’m sure Anne Jackson could have taken her post in many different directions as well, but was speaking out of her heart based on certain circumstances, etc. She continues to raise great questions in her writings.

When we think of the issue of modesty, or showing skin, in church or elsewhere….What are some angles or points of discussion that you would like to see raised?

As a woman, do you feel like the Church blames you, or puts the focus on you most of the time for this issue?

Or what questions do you have in your mind that you would like to see answered or at least wrestled with? One friend was asking me if there are appropriate times, places and contexts for women to dress sexy? So you see, there are a million rabbit trails we can go down, and I’m no expert. So let me hear from all of you.
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