by Rhett Smith on July 6, 2010
Striving for a healthy, thriving marriage–and simply trying to avoid divorce are two very different goals for therapy. One is proactive and the other is reactive. I’ve noticed that the proactive group is often quicker to get professional help for their marriage than the latter group. The reactive group often finds themselves in the counseling [...]
by Rhett Smith on June 18, 2010
I feel like I do some of my best thinking and reflecting while out on a run. And while I was running yesterday a few stanzas from the Coldplay song, What If? really stuck out to me… What if you should decide That you don’t want me there by your side That you don’t want [...]
by Rhett Smith on May 12, 2010
I recently just finished a really great book by Ronald Rolheiser, The Restless Heart: Finding Our Spiritual Home in Times of Loneliness. In one section of the book Rolheiser writes about a conversation he had with a nun. In that conversation the nun said the following: “my vocation is, at each moment, to make the [...]
by Rhett Smith on April 19, 2010
Unfortunately, one of the ministry lessons that has been drilled into my head over the years is that numbers matter. Specifically large numbers. I was rarely asked by my supervisors how an event went, or what stories I could tell about the ministry. It always seemed to be about metrics…things that can be measured in [...]
by Rhett Smith on April 12, 2010
[image by Rojer] One of the things that I have come to understand more clearly about marriage affairs, has come from a result of my continual growth as a therapist working with couples, and as a result of some great insight from some mentors and authors. And this is what I have learned: Affairs often [...]
by Rhett Smith on March 31, 2010
[image by epSos.de] God is Not Safe, So Why Do We Play So Safely There are lots of books, stories and examples displaying how we tend to play life too safely at times, and the need for us to overcome this complacency. One of the examples that is always in my mind is this exchange [...]
by Rhett Smith on March 5, 2010
I really appreciate Chad and Sarah opening up so much of their life with us this week. One of the reasons that I wanted to interview them was because I think that their story is, and can be so helpful to many other couples out there — and on so many levels. And if you [...]
by Rhett Smith on February 4, 2010
Last week I wrote about some of my initial thoughts on my upcoming trip to Haiti, and with each passing day I’m getting more and more excited, and a bit more nervous as well. One of the really exciting things is the coming together and completion of the team I will be serving with. The [...]
by Rhett Smith on January 21, 2010
[image by Adam Foster] “That’s not who I married!” It’s a response I often hear as I sit across from couples in therapy. At this point in the relationship one, or both of the spouses has become angered, disillusioned, sad (name the feeling/emotion) over what they feel is a loss of the person that they [...]
by Rhett Smith on January 5, 2010
One of the things that I have been telling myself the last few months is that I want to do a better job of “being present” with others in 2010. 2009 was an awesome year, but I felt overwhelmed, and overextended throughout much of the year. There were lots of reasons for that. Lack of [...]
