“Compassion asks us to go where it hurts, to enter into places of pain, to share in brokenness, fear, confusion, and anguish. Compassion challenges us to cry out with those in misery, to mourn with those who are lonely, to weep with those in tears. Compassion requires us to be weak with the weak, vulnerable with the vulnerable, and powerless with the powerless. Compassion means full immersion in the condition of being human. When we look at compassion this way, it becomes clear that something more is involved than a general kindness or tenderheartedness. It is not surprising that compassion, understood as suffering with, often evokes in us a deep resistance and even protest.” (Compassion: Reflections on the Christian Life by Nouwen, McNeill and Morrison, pp. 4).
Going to Haiti…
On Sunday night I received a most unexpected call asking me if I wanted to join a small team of people traveling to Haiti from February 11-17th. I was initially shocked by the opportunity, then anxiety quickly set in as I was informed I would have less than 24 hours to make the decision. And then slowly a little bit of fear set in as this would be one of the rare times of international travel that I would have to do since becoming a father. One thinks about life differently when they are single, than when they are a father, husband (and soon to be father to our second child). Other things to consider now.
As I got off the phone and talked with my wife I was hoping that she would not be too keen to the idea, and would even possibly help me say no to the opportunity. At least that’s what I think I wanted outwardly, but inwardly I was hoping she would give me the green light for the trip. I wanted to make sure that this was a decision we were both comfortable with. So when she said,
“I think this is an amazing opportunity, and I think you should go.”
I was sort of relieved, but then the anxiety kicked up a notch. My two and half year old daughter heard us talking and she said to me,
“Daddy, I want to go too.”
And I said to her,
“You want to go to Haiti with me?”
To which she replied,
“I have to get dressed first.”
I know there is a sermon analogy in there somewhere about the willingness of a child to faithfully follow their father without question. Continue Reading…


One of the questions that comes up a lot in my work with parents of high school and college students is:
One of the things that I have been telling myself the last few months is that I want to do a better job of “being present” with others in 2010. 2009 was an awesome year, but I felt overwhelmed, and overextended throughout much of the year. There were lots of reasons for that. Lack of boundaries primarily, but I also realized that I didn’t do a good job of being present (to people, to my surroundings, to my relationships, to God) because I found myself constantly online (on my desktop, or my phone) when I didn’t have something to fill my time. God forbid I actually sit still and do nothing…that I actually observe, watch, pay attention, reflect, pray, etc.
