This post was mentioned on Twitter by rhetter: Your Kids Online: What Are You Doing to Them? http://bit.ly/LCYDh // r u putting your kids at risk–not just about safety, but relationships…

Thanks for sharing. Lots of good info. here from you. I really learned a lot. At least there are plenty of options available to someone deciding how they want to share information online.

I tend to not worry too much about this stuff, but that’s why I want to make sure I’m thinking about it. Make sure I’m not underestimating the effects it can have.

Rhett
.-= Rhett Smith´s last blog ..MyTherapistMatch: Clearing the Connection Hurdle Between Client and Therapist =-.

Haaaa. That is irony. Very much so. I’ve done the same as you…gone back to check what pops up on a Google search cause some stuff I’ve written I’m not real proud of. It’s interesting now too, because clients can easily google me and find out info…make a determination if I’m a good fit or not without ever having met me, or realized that part of seeing ourselves online, we also see us grow…hopefully.

Good luck with the ordination stuff…keep me updated.

How is the writing going?

Rhett
.-= Rhett Smith´s last blog ..MyTherapistMatch: Clearing the Connection Hurdle Between Client and Therapist =-.

I think a lot of people misunderstand that there are many levels of sharing between web abstinence and sharing everything about your life on your blog.

For the less tech-savy readers, it’s pretty easy to prevent your webcontent from getting indexed, which means you can share it without having to worry about it being indexed.

WordPress has an option to hide your site from search engines (settings->privacy) and I’d assume most other blogging platforms do as well.

Likewise, photo repositories like Flickr and Picasa make it easy to restrict images and folders so you can control who has access to them.

If you have your own site with a hosting service it’s as simple as creating a robots.txt file.
.-= Scott Lenger´s last blog ..I am Not a Christian… =-.

It is a bit ironic perhaps the way I re-stumbled upon your blog just now. I was doing a google check on my own name as I have just begun the steps for coming under care of classis in my denomination for ordination and I want to see what trail I have left out in cyberspace. A comment I left on a post announcing the birth of your daughter two years ago is one of the things that came up. (And so I thought I should see what you are writing about these days).

I know I have found recently that I have written many things and posted them to the www that I wish I never had. I certainly do not want to start building a trail of regrets or embarrassments even now for my two children, who cannot even give their own input yet.

Thank you for these thoughts. I will continue to think on these things.

Blessings,
~wayne
.-= wayne´s last blog ..Same as it Never Was? =-.

Wow, great comment. Appreciate the feedback. The only reason I probably didn’t have as much content online of my daughter as yours is because you are more tech savvy. I take photos and video but always dropped the ball on getting them online, etc. So it’s not that my desire was less, it’s just that I didn’t have carry through. haaaa.

You point to a whole other issue about commodifying our children. I think that most parents, and you probably agree don’t do this. But there are some cases where I have cringed at some of the photos parents have posted online where they were the laughter really came at the expense of the kids, yet parents probably didn’t think about it since the kids were too young to notice.

Lots to think through my man……

Rhett
.-= Rhett Smith´s last blog ..Your Kids Online: What Are You Doing to Them? =-.

Another thought was how much of this is really about commodifying our children? I’m sorry but a lot of parental bloggers and flickr users are commodifying their children. And I have serious issues with that. It’s easy to give into, who doesn’t want their kid to be a star, have their picture favorited hundreds of times, etc? And for many, blogging about their children has become a means of making money, expanding readership, etc. I can’t imagine what image those children have of their parents, do they feel used like your example of the 5 yr. olds asking their parents not to post. (Wow, I hope I don’t can stop before we get to that point).

So I think your question is great: “And I need to ask myself the question if what I’m doing online is really for them, or really for me? Is it really more about filling up something inside of me than about preparing an online future for them (one that we really aren’t giving them any say in at this point )?”

Finally, you ask, “What effects, if any, will posting this stuff online have on my kids, or their relationships later on?” But I’m not sure we can even answer this question. For one, shouldn’t it be our kids who answer this question, and if they can’t answer it than maybe we should reconsider until they can, and secondly, we have absolutely no idea what kinds of innovations the Web will go through and so I think our speculations should be very tender.

My feeling is really that there is a difference between us and them. I choose what parts of my life, what thoughts, what photos, etc. to post, they on the other hand have no choice. This seems to me to be the most troubling feature of archiving our children online.

Thanks for your thoughts!!!