Archive - September, 2009

Jethro and Moses: A Story of Self-Care

September 9, 2009 in Marriage-Family, Ministry-Theology, Therapy-Psychology with 2 Comments

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[image by marvin L]

17 Moses’ father-in-law said to him, “The thing that you are doing is not good. 18 “You will surely wear out, both yourself and these people who are with you, for the task is too heavy for you; you cannot do it alone. 19 “Now listen to me: I will give you counsel, and God be with you. You be the people’s representative before God, and you bring the disputes to God, 20 then teach them the statutes and the laws, and make known to them the way in which they are to walk and the work they are to do. 21 “Furthermore, you shall select out of all the people able men who fear God, men of truth, those who hate dishonest gain; and you shall place these over them as leaders of thousands, of hundreds, of fifties and of tens. 22 “Let them judge the people at all times; and let it be that every major dispute they will bring to you, but every minor dispute they themselves will judge So it will be easier for you, and they will bear the burden with you. 23 “If you do this thing and God so commands you, then you will be able to endure, and all these people also will go to their place in peace.”

I was reflecting on this passage from Exodus 18:17-22, and I was struck by how it is a story of self-care–Jethro teaching Moses how to better take care of himself. If Moses can’t take care of himself, then how can he lead the people his family, and others around him??

  1. When you push and push and push, you not only wear yourself out, but you wear out those around you as well.
  2. Some tasks are too heavy for us though and we need help….we can’t go it alone.
  3. Sometimes we need to listen to the counsel of others.
  4. You are to allow others to help you bear your burdens.

If we aren’t careful we can burn out those around us with our pace, and our inability to regulate our own self-care.  So what is keeping you from taking better care of yourself? Is there someone you need to listen to…perhaps someone who has been telling you to slow down, rest, etc?  Maybe it’s a spouse, co-worker or friend?

We need to listen to that counsel from others.  Maybe it’s time to let go and allow others to help you with something.  Maybe time for you to delegate and allow others to participate.  Maybe time for you to allow others to help bear your burdens.

One of the best things we can do for others, whether it’s at work as a leader, in church as a pastor, or at home as a parent and spouse is to take care of ourselves.  If we can’t take care of ourselves, then we also can’t model it for our family.

What kind of lifestyle of self-care does your children, spouse, friends, families see you model?  Would they want to emulate it?

Self-care is ultimately about letting go of the control in your life, and maybe the ego or pride that says only I can do this task.

Cultivate 2009: My Interview with Cynthia Ware, and Why You Should Attend

September 8, 2009 in Ministry-Theology, Technology-Social Media with 2 Comments

The Cultivate Conference in Chicago is only about 6 weeks away and I’m getting more and more excited everyday with the number of amazing people that are showing up to participate.

Last week I posted my interview with Carlos Whitaker [aka Ragamuffinsoul], and he gave some phenomenal reasons for why he is attending, and WHY YOU TOO should attend.

This week I’m posting my interview with Cynthia Ware of the Digital Sanctuary. Check it out.

If you are attending Cultivate, comment and let us know what drew you to the conference. If you aren’t we hope you change your mind and that we see you next month.

Does Therapy Need to be Face to Face, In Person to be Beneficial?

September 3, 2009 in Technology-Social Media, Therapy-Psychology with 2 Comments

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[image by Wrote]

It was inevitable that with the emergence of more and more of our lives online that the field of therapy would see more and more benefit from doing therapy online, but even still, lots of questions remain for both practitioners and clients. In an article from Monday (thanks to John Saddington for pointing me to the article) the title says it all, Therapy online: Good as face to face? The article begins by talking about a study on the topic of depression:

Participants were randomly assigned to either receive online cognitive behavioral therapy in addition to usual physician care — which may include antidepressant medication — or to continue their usual care and be placed on a waiting list. The intervention consisted of up to 10 55-minute sessions, five of which were expected to be completed by the four-month follow-up.

Of the 113 people who did online therapy, 38 percent recovered from depression after four months, compared with 24 percent of people in the control group. The benefits were maintained at eight months, with 42 percent of the online therapy group and 26 percent of the control group having recovered.

The level of benefit shown in the study is about the same as could be expected from traditional therapy, although the researchers did not compare the two as part of the experiment, said Dr. Gregory Simon, a psychiatrist and researcher at Group Health Cooperative in Seattle, Washington, who wrote the editorial that accompanied the study.

Benefits of Online Therapy
This article and a slew of other articles out there talk about the many benefits of doing therapy online. Things such as:

  1. Providing therapy to those with limited/no access to see a therapist.
  2. Some studies show that therapy over the internet allows clients to put down their guard, be more open and vulnerable than in person.
  3. Often the stigma of going into see a therapist is removed.
  4. According to some studies, like the one above, the benefit of therapy online is similar to that in person.

These are just a few of the more common benefits.

What other benefits can you think of?

Limitations of Online Therapy

  1. Some experts say that online therapy limits some of the visual cues in gesture, as well as “speech intonations.”
  2. Some see a limitation in rapport building when not done in person. Continue Reading…
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