There are lots of good books on marriage, but I want to mention just six of them here that I highly recommend. And in recommending them, let me just give one brief statement of why I like them.
As For Me and My House: Crafting Your Marriage to Last by Walter Wangerin Jr.
- I love Wangerin’s approach in talking about marriage here. He doesn’t write about steps to follow, but really approaches the topic from a real narrative standpoint, sharing story after story that the reader can enter into and relate to about marriage.
Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love by Sue Johnson
- Johnson is the pioneer of “emotionally focused (couple’s) therapy. And this is an important book on this topic that is very accessible for couple’s to read.
Passionate Marriage: Keeping Love and Intimacy Alive in Committed Relationships by David Schnarch
- Schnarch’s discussion on “differentiation” is very valuable. I love his insight.
Sacred Marriage: Celebrating Marriage as a Spiritual Discipline by Gary Thomas
- His first chapter on how marriage is about “holiness and not happiness” is paradigm shifting in most of our views. It was mine.
The Mystery of Marriage: Meditations on the Miracle by Mike Mason
- This is my favorite book on marriage. Not steps, just a deep, philosophical and theological look at marriage that is quite refreshing.
The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work by John Gottman and Nan Silver
- I mentioned this book last week, but it’s a great book with some very practical tips and exercises for couples.
What books would you add to this list and why?
Boundaries by Cloud/Townsend. Because it kicks me in the crotch in that special way that I usually deserve.
Puh-sychoanalyze /that/ statement
.
peace|dewde
http://dewde.com
I was going to add Sacred Marriage to your list if you didn’t have it. It is a perspective that no other christian marroage book that I have read has.
I would add:
Emerson Eggerichs:
1) Love & Respect
2) Cracking the Communication Code
I think Emerson’s Love & Respect book is foundational to understanding the marriage dynamic between a man and woman.
Gary Chapman:
3) The Five Love Languages
4) The Five Languages of Apology
An understanding of the five love languages gives an unparalleled perspective to how we express and expect love.
The five languages of apology may not be a marriage-focused book, but it show us how to apologize which, in turn, will heal many of our relationships including our marriage.
I was going to add sacred marriage to your list but am excited to see you already have it!
Marc:
Awesome list…thanks for adding those.
Chris:
Boundaries is a great book. A must read, and helpful obviously in any sphere of relationships, friendships…life in general.
Mandy and Adam:
Awesome. Yep, that is a great book. Glad that I’m not alone in that assessment.
Rhett
I’ve found it difficult to find good marriage books that really stress the mutuality of love and subordination within marriage. So many still play into the partriachalism and old gender stereotypes and categories that are unhealthy and much of our culture thrives on. From the looks of it, this list doesn’t fall into that. Thanks for sharing, I’ll be picking these up Rhett.
Wess,
Cool. I think they represent a good range. I chose them also because they don’t play into gender stereotypes.
Probably the Passionate Marriage is one of the best and I think it is good on the mutuality of love and subordination within marriage. I think how he looks at differentiation is super helpful when talking about these things.
Rhett