I’m currently writing up outlines for a parenting class I will be doing over the summer at Highland Park Presbyterian Church. The class will meet once a month through the summer and will be focused on the book by Chap and Dee Clark, Disconnected: Parenting Teens in a MySpace World.
As I was working on these classes, this quote really jumped off the page for me.
“Your child is not a problem to be solved, but a creative, talented, and unique gift to be understood, embraced, and ultimately set free. (pp. 18)
I think it jumped off the page for me because parents often bring their kids to their youth pastors or to therapists so that they can be fixed. Being both in youth ministry and a therapist, I have come to realize that when a parent brings in a child and says that to me, that is usually a sign that there are larger issues going on in the family, and often the child has become the identified patient.
If you are a parent, what do you think about this quote? What sticks out for you?
I have young kids but I could not agree more. I have heard all too often in regards to my kids and their behavior – that I need to “fix it” now or I will loose them forever.
When we aim to fix our kids – we are usually doing so to save face or to put on a facade that we are good parents. When our children are caught in their sins – all to often the punishment or consequences come out of our want to be seen as good parents instead of really wanting what is best for our children.
I am challaneged to really think every day about my children and what they were created for… The were created out of God’s word – in Gensis – he says to go forth and be fruitful. My goal in teaching them to obey is so that ultimately they know Christ and find His will for their life.
Can’t wait to read and hear more on this!!!
I think this is such a good reminder for us as parents…so often we get into the rut of trying to teach our children to fit into the mold that we have created…the expectation we have set within our own minds as to who we want our children to be or how we want them to act. It's a great reminder to daily be open to understanding who God created each of our children to be…what unique personalities, gifts and passions did He give them? I think we have to be very careful not to stifle those with our own desires….a daily intentional effort.