My wife and I have been talking for months about whether or not we should get rid of our TV. And it’s a slow process. It first began by reducing from two DVR’s to one. Then it continued with cutting all of our cable but the bare minimum/basics so we can keep the one DVR to record the shows we like. Then my wife said, “Let’s give up TV for Lent.” And I immediately agreed.
This is not a big deal for a lot of you. Many of you don’t have TV’s, or you watch the bare minimum anyways. But for some of you, it would be a big deal. And it was a big deal for us, but an easy decision.
Here are some reasons…
- We found ourselves coming home and immediately turning the TV on, even if we weren’t watching it. That was scary.
- We noticed our 20mos old daughter always asking to watch her shows (Dora, Signing Time, etc.)
- We felt like we were in a big transition in life and needed the quiet to pray, hear God’s voice and discern wisely.
- We had lots to do that wasn’t getting done.
- We felt exhausted all the time and watching TV seem to perpetuate that.
- Lots of people we admire don’t own, or watch TV (The Saddington’s, The Steward’s, my cousins, my brother and sister-inlaw, etc.). We kept looking around and noticed that there was a correlation between those who didn’t have a TV, or watched it very limited, and the effectiveness of how they spent their time, their success, as well as the joy they seemed to have.
- It’s hard to really maintain a healthy level of relational connectivity and intimacy in our marriage if the TV is always on.
- We wanted to read more (our Bibles, as well as just our novels, theology, therapy texts, etc.).
- We wanted to set a better example for each other, especially our daughter.
- This is the testing ground to help us determine if we should cut cable completely and possibly get rid of our TV, or at least put it away.
And 36 Days In….
Well, we have had our moments. There are times when it is super easy, and times when we are really wanting to turn it on. But all in all, it has been much easier than expected. This is my second longest stint of no TV. I went about four months when I was living in Guatemala, and that was super easy and I didn’t miss it at all. In fact, that’s when I felt I grew the most as a person, and I think there was a correlation to not watching TV that played a factor in that.
Here are just a few things that I have observed in the last 36 days…
- If you aren’t careful, TV becomes more than a habit, but an unconscious compulsion and serious addiction.
- If you can resist the initial impulse to turn the TV on, like for example when you walk in the door or after dinner…then it gets easier through the night to not have it on.
- My daughter has stopped asking to watch her TV shows, and I’ve noticed that she has engaged in more creative and imaginary play than before.
- We have been better able to connect as a married couple, and also listen to God, which in turn has helped us make some wiser decisions about our future in many areas of our lives.
- We have been dreaming more about what life can and should be, and we have picked up old hobbies, or pursued new ones.
- I’m enjoying music and books more than before.
- I’m more productive (writing, blogging, reading, working around the house).
- I’m more desirous and content with complete stillness and quiet…not productivity.
- Friendships have flourished more since I am more readily available to make phone calls and catch up and listen to people.
- I’m appreciating the smaller things in life that I think were drowned out by the constant noise and visual stimulation.
I would love to hear your thoughts…
- Do you watch/own a TV? Why or why not?
- Have you ever thought about reducing the amount of TV you watched?
- If you have got rid of your TV, or watch the bare minimum, what has been the effect on you or your family?
- What’s the hardest thing about not having/watching TV?
So only about 10-11 more days for us…we have cheated a bit and are recording some shows that we like and have missed during this time. We are looking forward to watching some of them. But we are also thinking about whether or not we need to get rid of the TV, or set better boundaries around it. This Lent period has definitely given us a better vision of how great life can be when TV is not in control.
{ 15 comments… read them below or add one }
We are going to scale way back – from satellite with 200 TV/movie/music channels to a digital converter box and an antenna. We’ll still watch, but we’ll watch only when there is something on we REALLY want to watch, not just mindless channel surfing.
The decision is also a financial one. We need to free up funds so we can work our way out of debt.
My husband and I have been married for three years and we’ve never had a teevee. We even got a really big one as a wedding gift and took it back to Best Buy in exchange for a nice iPod stereo.
We had both decided – before we met – that we didn’t want to watch a lot of teevee. In the sermon on the mount, Jesus talks about the eye as the lamp of the body. There’s so much ungodliness and compromise that is portrayed as “normal” on teevee that we just choose not to expose ourselves to it.
At first, getting rid of it is hard, but after a while you just get used to not knowing the hottest shows or the movies that are coming out, and it’s not a big deal. And then you start to wonder how you ever had time to sit in front of an hour-long program to begin with.
ours ended up being a financial decision. we were moving, we needed to downsize, we were in a major transition in life as we were going from corporate america to ministry. the tv happened to be one of our possessions that could actually sell for a decent amount. we only used it for movies and playstation, anyways. ha. in a choice between faster internet and cable, john easily chose quicker download speed. =) so it actually wasn’t that hard, b/c we we didn’t have cable and were already watching all our “tv” online. so, in regards to how much tv we watch…we treat it almost like “movie time,” in that we have to intentionally carve out the time, and usually that means a show or two 4/7 days a week after roenne goes to bed. it works for us, even though i have to watch 24 on tuesdays, and yes, avoid twitter on monday night. =)
I moved into a new apartment several weeks ago and had planned to order cable, but honestly didn’t have the time to take from work to sit at home and wait for the cable guy to come and install. In that time, I’ve realized I haven’t missed it, and probably won’t be ordering it (a decision that was fairly easy since it’s not football season!). My boyfriend at first thought I was crazy that I wouldn’t be ordering cable, but we have both realized that when he comes over, we are having great conversations that could have easily not been had if I had cable.
I have a TV in my room… bad idea. I also have TiVo… which I’ve determined I cannot live without since I’m never actually home when my shows are airing. But I’ve been on TiVo withdrawal for the last couple weeks as I’ve started dating a wonderful girl named Julia. We do things together! Sure we’ve hung out on the couch and watched a couple movies… but I’ve not been watching as much TiVo lately. I have a lot of shows that I’m addicted to… we’re talkin 20+. My new favorite is Kings on NBC… I’m really interested in it because it’s taken right out of the bible and shows David’s life if it were lived in the 21st century.
So there are some shows that I don’t think I could ever give up. So I will never completely get rid of my TV. But I do think that there is something to be said for having a schedule and a set amount of time to watch TV per day. Too much can consume your life and you could start to live in a bubble…
But that’s just my opinion… I could be wrong.
My wife and I cut our TV as well, although we didn’t analyze it nearly as much as you have
We did it because we didn’t want to pay the cable bill anymore. But we soon realized that we were having a lot more fun together, were more connected as a couple, and were re-engaging in hobbies that we had sort of forgot about. It’s been great.
We still have the TV around, and we’ll watch a movie every once in a while, and 30 Rock on hulu.com every week, but our lives don’t revolve around what’s on TV anymore. We love it!
I’ll be the one who loves TV. I’ve got my shows and my wife has hers. Yep, it can and does interfere with somethings. My son and daughter in law are getting rid of their cable and setting up a linux box for hulu etc. I’ll keep my cable.
If I had to “theologically” justify TV; I’d say it allows me to know what is going on among the “out of churched” people in Portland. I can cringe and laugh at Scrubs with the 20 something friends of the church and ask questions of them about the actions of the characters and get some pretty thoughtful responses.
I praise you for listening to God’s voice in this matter for you and for bravely pursuing it.
Alan
Rhett,
NO WAY!! I had no idea you were a big blogger. All those days at hppc and you never told us about your blog. YOU ARE ON ALLTOP??!! When the heck what the heck how the heck?? Anyway, hope things are going great
J
Art,
Yes, “REALLY” want to watch is a great emphasis and not mindless surfing…we too as well.
And YES, I totally skipped the financial piece. That was a huge reason for us..we are trying to get out of debt and our on Dave Ramsey’s plan (Total Money Makeover)…so no room for cable in our budget.
Lex,
that’s great…I know more couples doing that now…just going without the TV, especially in the early stages of marriage.
Sue,
Of course John chose faster download speed….and I love how watching TV is like movie night…carving out time. I think that’s where we are heading.
Amanda,
Football vs. great conversations with your boyfriend…hmmmmm. I wonder which wins for you. I love how things we thought we needed don’t even matter when we try life without it (i.e. the TV, not the boyfriend
Graham,
As I tweeted to you earlier…nothing like dating to remind you what’s important and to take your eyes away from TV.
Daniel,
Haaaa….I really only analyzed it that much in hindsight…but financial was a big reason for us, and just wanting more time together. I think we might move to more of a Hulu “model” of watching tv in the future.
Alan,
Theologically, I have no problem with watching TV…in fact, we still DVR’d our favorite shows (24, Lost, Heroes, 11th Hour, CSI), etc and plan to watch them after our Lent fast…but we plan to enter back into the world of TV differently….carving out time for it, rather than letting it dominate a lot of our night. And who knows, we may go without it. I watch TV as a means to connect with people, which was especially important in LA when more than half of our church was in the entertainment industry. But I’m finding that I know all I need to know surfing the web a little each day as well.
John Hill,
haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. I don’t talk about blogging much. I probably did back in the day….but thanks though. we should chat soon.
rhett
Today is actually our last day with TV as we know it – we’ll reduce to an antenna for locals and Hulu (or other online distribution) for the few shows we watch (i.e. Lost).
We’ve been reducing our TV consumption for a while and we’ve experienced the same thing – greater connection to Jesus, each other, and more time to do the quality things!
Rhett. Good stuff here. We don’t have TV and I never plan to ouw one again. But we cheat too and watch a coue things on hulu and get netflix. Even without a tv we need to think through what you’ve said.
Wess,
thanks man…I have no doubt you and your family is really discipline and wise with your time…you seem to always be studying, reading, or hanging out with family…..
Cheat? I think that’s good though…watch hulu and use netflix…that way you are more in control and just don’t mindless surf the TV….
Let me know how it goes…
rhett
Since having our daughter, we’re definitely watching less TV. Actually, my wife reminds me that she doesn’t really watch any TV now. I’m still clinging to my reasons – 24, CNN, Office, Damages, and the Lakers. But really, I can’t remember the last Laker game I’ve watched from beginning to end.
So our TV watching has been the result of being busy with our daughter. I can see after a while, you really don’t feel like you missed anything, and American Idol seems really stupid just scanning the Internet news sites.
I do feel that having TV makes me feel connected to the outside world, but is it necessary – not really. I agree – it’s a healthier way to live.
I’m going on day 3,628 without a TV and it is working out so far. The more time you spend away from TV the less you will miss it and the more inane and offensive the programming will become to you.
I enjoy watching certain shows on Hulu (mainly 30 Rock and The Office) and my four-year-old daughter watches DVDs on the computer (two 20-minute shows a day, maximum) but 99% of TV is intelligence-insulting crap or “materialism porn” that makes you desire commodities you don’t need and wouldn’t want otherwise.
However, my favorite part about not having a TV is not watching the news. My wife and I listen to the radio or read the web for news and therefore are spared from the endless cycle of non-stories and “grisly murder of the month” coverage overkill.
(Found your blog via Wess’s, btw.)
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