Archive - February, 2009

Affirmation: One of Technology’s Negative Effects on Your Marriage and Family

February 10, 2009 in Marriage-Family, Technology-Social Media, Therapy-Psychology with 21 Comments

jleMcLuhan and Twitter via John Dyer
This is a post I have had in the making for a while, but when I read John Dyer’s post Tools for Tech Thinking: McLuhan on Twitter, and well, he unknowingly gave me some inspiration to post some of my thoughts on this issue.

Read John’s post for some context, but essentially Marshall McLuhan in his seminal work The Medium is the Message poses four questions about media/technology:

  1. What does it (the medium or technology extend)?
  2. What does it make obsolete?
  3. What is retrieved?
  4. “What does the technology reverse into if it is over-extended?

John does a great job of summarizing what these four things are, but for this post I’m concerned about question four, “What does the technology reverse into if it is over-extended?” John explicates the question in this way:

What does Twitter reverse into if it is over-extended?

This is McLuhan’s “negative” question where he gives examples like the ability to project one’s voice is lost if the microphone is overused and the ability to walk long distances is lost when one relies on vehicles.

  • Twitter can connect physically distant individuals, but when overused it can also isolate a person from those who are physically near (like spouses) reversing into a state of more disconnectedness.
  • Twitter can also reverse into a level of shallowness, because communication is limited to 140 characters.
  • Twitter can also reverse into a mess of noise and distraction since so many voices are speaking  at the same time.

Technology and Affirmation
Most of us may not realize it, but technology is often a major source of affirmation for us in our lives. John is speaking of Twitter, but Twitter is not the only culprit. Name it: Facebook, blogs, mommy forums, fantasy leagues, chat, MySpace, email, Blackberry’s i-Phones, etc, etc.

We go to these sites and belong to these online communities because in some shape, form or fashion we are affirmed in them. People accept us, care for us, are there for us. It soon becomes an instant source of affirmation.

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Depression, Burnout & Ministry: Discernment in Pastoral Caregiving

February 6, 2009 in Marriage-Family, Ministry-Theology, Therapy-Psychology with 4 Comments

Discernment
As we talk and think about the issue of depression in ministry one of the most important factors that we have in helping us determine what exactly we are dealing with is discernment.

the quality of being able to grasp and comprehend what is obscure

Discerning what type of help a person needs can be tricky. Should they see a therapist? A psychiatrist? Both? Is a recommendation for meds necessary? Are we dealing with depression, melancholy, burning out, etc? Maybe it’s all, maybe it’s some, maybe it’s none. But the act of discernment is a process and often involves multiple people helping one through their difficult journey.

In the book Depression and Hope: New Insights for Pastoral Counseling (which I mention quite a bit, is a great resource, and which I will reference and quote from heavily in this post), Howard W. Stone says:

Depression disturbs one’s most important relationships; for melancholics this may mean family members or close friends. For the mystic or hermit monk, and indeed for all faithful Christians, that most important relationship is with God. When people feel the absence of God, when they doubt, when religious ritual and service lose meaning, their experiences are very similar to the symptoms of depression.

Pastoral caregivers listen in a certain way to the words of those who are disconsolate, a way that is distinct from other helping professionals. To clergy and other professionals in ministry, despair, suffering, struggle, and adversity are laden with spiritual import, because reflection on the experience of melancholy and spiritual desolation can bring depth and meaning to those who are trying to be faithful to the call of Christ (Stone, 21).

When dealing with issues of such vital importance, you can see why discernment is key. One of the reasons I went back to graduate school again for my MFT (Master of Science in Marriage and Family Therapy) was because after 10 years in ministry, I was well aware of the fact that my Master of Divinity had not prepared me adequately enough to deal with such issues…In fact, I would say that it’s quite rare for most people entering into ministry to have a decent understanding of mental health issues and the role of the pastor in pastoral caregiving.

In his book Stone talks about four experiences that “compare strongly to depression: the dark night of the soul, ‘accidie’, desolations, and Martin Luther’s understanding of ‘Anfechtungen’”. Fascinating stuff! Let me just mention them briefly here:

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Depression, Burnout & Ministry: Christians and Medications

February 4, 2009 in Ministry-Theology, Therapy-Psychology with 15 Comments

Credit: depressionofspirits.com

“you may have questions about whether Christians should take this or that. You get in that state, I assure you, you will take rat dung.” Pastor Tommy Nelson

Why the Stigma?
Let me start this post by saying this. When it comes to the issue of taking medication for depression…there are some Christians who believe in it, and those that do not.

I believe in them. And I’m not trying to convince you otherwise. That will require circumstances, experiences convincing beyond my control.

I have worked long enough in the ministry and therapeutic setting to see the amazing and beneficial results that they have had in the lives of the co-workers, students and clients that I have journeyed through life with.

I believe God has given scientists/doctors/researchers amazing minds to create some medications that can help.

As one friend says, “If someone is diabetic, they are going to take insulin…aren’t they?”

Or I tell my friends, “If you have a heart condition, you are going to the cardiologist, right?”

So what’s the stigma around mental health and medications in the Christian life? I’m not completely sure. There is some disconnect it seems. Or rather than disconnect, there is some inconsistency in how we pick and choose what areas of our lives we seek help on, and what areas we think we should be able to pick ourselves up by our own bootstraps.

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Innovation3 Gathering: Incarnational Reality

February 3, 2009 in Ministry-Theology, Technology-Social Media with 3 Comments

incarnation: the act of embodying or state of being embodied in human form

I have been thinking about that word quite a bit in recent months as I have come “face to face” with more and more of my online friends on Facebook, Twitter and blog. In fact, if you have read my blog recently, you know that one of my 2009 goals is to “take online community offline.”

But I’ve really been thinking about this idea after Innovation3 Gathering last week where I participated as a live blogger. In fact, I’m not the only person thinking about this concept. Cynthia Ware wrote the post Face to Face at Innovation3 Gathering, and Rick W. Smith wrote the post Innovation3 aka Nationwide Tweet Up (see Rick’s video below).

I remember just a few years ago when I used to attend a conference and the only people I knew were a) people I had met at that conference the year before; b) someone whom I “ran” in the same ministry circles with; c) someone famous (aka author/pastor/speaker). But most of the conference was spent getting to know people at the most basic level…exchanging of information and informalities.

But that has all seemed to change here in the last year or so. With the large number of people on Twitter, it’s almost as if these conferences are becoming a reunion, rather than a first time meeting. And the reason I mention Twitter is because it’s different than Facebook, in that the daily conversation creates a relationship that other technologies do not (look for my upcoming post in Collide Magazine on this topic). My first experience of this was at ECHO in August of 2008. Then at ChurchTechCamp:.Dallas in January of 2009. Then at Innovation3 Gathering this last week.

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Depression, Burnout & Ministry: Assessment

February 2, 2009 in Ministry-Theology, Therapy-Psychology with 7 Comments

Assessing Depression
This is the 4th post in my series on Depression, Burnout & Ministry, and it is the one where I hope to provide some critieria of symptoms that might help us out if we are wondering about this issue.

There are a variety of factors and tools that one may use in assessing if someone has depression.  In ministry, there were usually a few questions I may have asked a student to better assess what was going on.  I still ask those questions of people in ministry, as well as in my clinical work.  In my work as a Marriage and Family Therapist one of the main tools that we use is the DSM-IV (i.e. Diagnostic and Statistical Manual for Mental Disorders).  Whether or not one believes in diagnosing individuals, some of the criteria they provide is very helpful in getting a sense of the symptoms that one is exhibiting.

51yeqm7b52l_bo2204203200_pisitb-sticker-arrow-clicktopright35-76_aa240_sh20_ou01_As a pastor, leader, or volunteer in the Church you most likely will not look at the criteria in the DSM-IV, but it’s important to have a baseline of criteria that one’s symptoms can be measured against.  A book that I have found really helpful is Depression and Hope: New Insights for Pastoral Counseling by Howard W. Stone.  In this great book Stone says the following:

Criteria for Depression

Depression, or melancholia, is known in psychiatric terminology as major depression to distniguish it from the normal low periods that many people go through.  The psychiatric diagnostic criteria for major depression lists nine symptoms, as follows:

  1. Depressed mood, sadeness, irritability part of each day, nearly every day
  2. Diminished pleasure or interest in daily activities
  3. Considerable weight loss or gain, change in appetite
  4. Significant change in sleeping patterns (The most common result is early waking.)
  5. Marked increase or decrease in movement (Most commonly the person physically slows down.)
  6. Fatigue and loss of energy
  7. Feelings of worthlessness or guilt (The feelings are beyond the scope of how people would usually feel.)
  8. Difficulty in concentration
  9. Ideas of suicide or death

To be diagnosed with major depression according to the American Psychiatric Assocation criteria, persons must exhibit at least five symptoms for a minimum of two weeks, and have either depressed mood or diminished pleasure or interest on most days for at least part of the day (APA 1994).  These criteria are a good basis for determining if someone really is depressed.  The certainly are not exhaustive but signal that a person’s story may be one of melancholia. (pp. 65-66)

How Does Depression Manifest in Ministry
I think there are many ways that depression manifests itself in ministry, but what I would like to do is mention how in a few different areas I think it has manifested for me on occasion, and I’m curious to hear from you.  The tricky thing with depression and burnout is that we can experience symptoms along the spectrum without being considered clinically depressed.  Here is how I experienced it at some levels, even though I have never been clinically diagnosed myself.

Emotionally:  Not being able to enter into, or handle anymore conversations, meetings, encounters with people in ministry.  My fuse was short and I was unable to pay attention at a certain level.  It’s an emotional exhaustion.  Often this mosts manifests itself at home with the people we love.  We give all we have at work, but have little energy for home.

Spiritually: Not being able to pray or read Scripture.  In fact, most of that was masked by ministry prayer (in meetings, services, etc.), but little of my own prayer life.  Also, most of my Scripture reading was for sermon preparation, but very little of my own prayer devotion and meditation.  I think this is very common in ministry, where pastors spend hours upon hours in sermon preparation and consider that to be part of their devotion and meditation.

Physically: Being so exhausted that you don’t have the energy for one more event or meeting.  In fact, when you are doing your yearly calendar, your relief comes from looking at the date about 9 months out when you can rest.  That is depressing.

I would love to hear from you.  How have you experienced depression in ministry?  Can you share some examples?

The next post in this series I will be taking a look at the history of depression in the Church and spiritual writings.  But for now, don’t forget to check out the three previous posts:

Depression, Burnout & Ministry: Deciding to Get Honest About Our Journeys

Depression, Burnout & Ministry: Anne Jackson Interview, Part 1

Depression, Burnout & Ministry: Anne Jackson Interview, Part 2

Disclaimer: This blog post is not to be a substitute for professional help or advice.  Please consider seeking out professional help if you consider yourself to be at risk for depression.
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